I don’t know if y’all remember but a couple years back when hackers started breaking into influencers instagrams and holding them hostage, I’ve always had the thought that if my IG ever did get hacked I’d walk away from this life and be okay with it. Something I always have to remind myself is “if social media disappeared tomorrow, would I still have something to offer the world?” Would my voice still matter? Would my opinion still hold weight? Or am I just pixels a part of this wicked machine we call social media?

My feed in the past year and a half has become a lot more #ads and #sponcon instead of actually sharing, connecting and telling you my story. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not talking shit, that sponsored content and advertising is what has allowed me to grow my brand, my reach and connect with more of you. It’s also not like I say yes to every collaboration request, I turn a lot of collaborations down and right now the only “regular” partnerships I have are with Lulu’s and Clavin Klein. There are a handful of skincare brands I always say yes to because they were the ones who started with me when I had maybe two thousand followers to present day, but nonetheless, I’ve been feeling like a sell out.

So I did something that’s probably social suicide or suicide in general for anyone who chooses this path. I disabled my instagram. I did this in a conscious effort to get back to writing, to get back to sharing my life without counting the likes, shares or saves. My voice was most honest, most relatable and most listened to when I was so raw and open and shared my breakup with you guys. That was a level of connecting that a 1x1 photo on my feed could never do and will never do. Who knows how long I’ll actually survive without instagram, because unfortunately it has become so engrained in my life. My hope is that I’m able to share at least a handful of honest moments in my life that once again let my readers know they are not alone.

While I’m putting together the posts of what’s been happening in my life so far in 2019, if you’re new to my blog read the stories below, if you’re OG why not take a trip down memory lane and remind yourself why you felt we connected in the first place.